Life Lesson

This past week I've been texting constantly with Cute Boy (he's been out of town) and sort of neglecting most of my other interests. Part of the problem is I don't actually have a computer at home and it can be a pain lugging my laptop to and from, especially since I've started riding the bus to work. I figure, my luck, I'd leave it at home and be screwed at work for that day - not a good way to impress the boss-types. So I've sent a couple of emails to one person (and the texting). I feel like I'm really clicking with Cute Boy, but it's hard to tell over texts, it could just be wishful thinking since I think he's so darn cute! We did make plans to get together last night. Since he's been traveling he just wanted to be able to have a quiet evening so we stayed at my place, ordered pizza and watched Raiders of the Lost Ark. There was also lots of fun making out, all very proper (basically he didn't try to get beyond making out - which is good, since I wouldn't have let him get further than he did). I feel like I can be silly with him and that is incredibly freeing. It's sort of like when I was younger and had a crush on a guy, I'd be silly and affectionate and never worry about what they would think about what I was saying, it's nice!

One of the really refreshing things about Cute Boy is that he is so honest. We actually had a discussion about dating (imagine that!). He told me he is dating other people because he doesn't think that one can tell what one likes or dislikes in a partner without experiencing different traits & attitudes. He also feels like if you date only one person at a time that you may be seeing what you want to see, not what that person really is. I had never put it in words before, but that is a viewpoint I've thought about a lot this morning and I have to agree with it. I'm really impressed that he has actually thought out why he's dating other people, I don't know if many people do (I didn't). However, knowing that he's seeing other people made me realize that I'm in a whole new ballgame. Most of my life I've spent jumping in and out of exclusive relationships, never really 'playing the field'. I'm going to have to learn to be a little less emotion/instinct driven than I've ever been just to keep myself from getting hurt. That will be hard for me. I'm going to have to be a lot more consciously aware of my feelings. I think if I can do that and then make sure I'm actually telling people my feelings (not just assuming they know) I can keep myself safe without compromising my nature.